What is self-love, and why is it a superpower? Everybody loves themselves, but a lot of people are not actively practicing this. By not practicing self-love we are missing out on a chance to make the experience that is life even more grand than it already is!
Table of Contents
What is self-love?
Self-love is more than just one thing, it consists of 6 key elements;
- Mental health; Reduce your stress and learn healthy coping mechanisms.
- Self-acceptance; Accepting that you are good enough just the way you are.
- Boundaries; Have healthy conversations and set boundaries in relationships by giving and taking.
- Self-care; Make time to meet your needs. Spend time on hobbies and things you like.
- Inner voice; Talk to yourself as if you are in conversation with your best friend.
- Self-discovery; Trying out and learn new things. Set goals, spend time on your interests.
All of these elements are equally important. But that does not mean you need to spend an equal amount of time on each. You will already be more active with some elements than others. Focus on the ones you are the least active in to start with first.
Is self-love egocentric?
Everyone will practice self-love differently, and in accordance with their own needs. But what’s universal in practicing self-love, is that you put your own well-being and happiness before others. This might sound egocentric and selfish, but the opposite is true. You can only fill someone’s glass when your own flask is full. Meaning that once you take good care of yourself, and you are in a good place, you will then be able to, and want to, help the people around you attain the same.
If you try and help before you have taken care of yourself, you will undoubtedly get results. But those results will not be as impactful as when you do it after you filled your own flask. When you are genuinely happy with who you are and how you live your life, you want everyone to experience the same. But when you are not in that place yourself, it is very difficult to help someone else get there.
Where to start?
Self-love means to take care of yourself, or self-care. This can take many different forms. Exercise, eating healthy, training your brain etc… There are so many ways you can express this there are bound to be a few that will resonate with you.
A few ways you can start practicing more self-love today;
- Put yourself first, always
- Only compare yourself with yourself from the day before
- Talk to yourself as if you are talking to your best friend
- Forgive yourself when you make a mistake
- Smile every time you see yourself in a mirror and say I love you to yourself
Focus on the need not the want
Loving yourself means filling your life with actions that reflect your self-esteem. You can practice meditation to quiet your mind and discover what your desires are. Become aware of your wants, needs, and emotions.
Find out what makes you happy and prioritize doing more of that. Make sure you take care of your body by eating healthy and staying hydrated. The actions that you take should reflect what you need rather than what you want. From making sure that you get what you need will naturally flow what you want.
When you start to practice self-love, your self-esteem will become higher and higher. The actions you take should always be in some way beneficial to you. If the actions are not beneficial to you, then don’t do them!
Before you think that it means never doing something you don’t like, no. You can still do something you’re not found of, because it helps a loved one. That’s still self-love as the helping of a loved one should give you a good and happy feeling.
From extrinsic to intrinsic
When you start to practice self-love you will discover that your motivation will shift from extrinsic to intrinsic. You are no longer doing things to get a medal, praise or payment, you start doing things because they are good for you, and make you happy. They come forth out of your values and priority’s.
From that intrinsic motivation you will receive greater gratification than that you got from things done out of extrinsic motivation. The things you do, you do because they are beneficial to you. They help you get further and make you happy.
Example;
Before you might have been motivated to work on your body for the coming summer, but after summer your motivation plummets, and you stop going to the gym. The looks and praise you would get from others during summer gave you the motivation to do the work. That’s extrinsic motivation.
Intrinsic motivation is when you go to the gym all year long because the way it makes you feel about yourself. This type of motivation is ever lasting, because it is purely about and for you.
Self-love is a superpower
By taking care of yourself, you are showing your body, mind and soul that you appreciate and love them. This will result in an overall betterment of your well-being. It will start to heal your mental health, your body will become stronger and more resilient, you will experience more joy and happiness, and your connections with your loved ones will deepen. It is truly a superpower that will enrich your life on every level!
Enjoy life to the fullest, BEINLOVEWITHYOURSELF!
